so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize