i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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