duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize