All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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