This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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