After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
