i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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