Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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