I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
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I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
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Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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