I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
