I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize
