her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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