So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
