I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
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2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
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Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize