I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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