I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
pop tarts are not kleenex
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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