i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Randomize
