I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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