We're like a lot better than the average bears
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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