I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
