At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I said "one day" and that day is not today
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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