I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
