sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Randomize
