can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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