:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize