belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
