I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
