I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
We smell like vodka and hangover
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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