The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Randomize
