I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
