somebody snuck up and got me drunk
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
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No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
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party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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