no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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