How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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