i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
MIDGETS
????
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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