yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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