That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
