i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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