I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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