i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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