You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
