More tranny stories later!
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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