Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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