I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize