Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
You are the jesus of drinking
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
