Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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