Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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