OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
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Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
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i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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