we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
