my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
