redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Randomize
